id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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