Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize