Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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