Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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