i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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