i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Couch. On fire.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize