Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
