Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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