Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
