can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
