she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
