walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
