I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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