and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
should my penis look like a turkey
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
