I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I want to be your penis for a week.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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