let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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