He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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