I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
