were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize