i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
