D3 body, D1 cock
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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