found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
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