Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
