Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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