Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
