Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
