I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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