Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize