Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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