i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
