Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
