hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
