My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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