Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
