Where is the hickey?
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
