I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
