is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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