Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
