when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I love how my cats smell like pot.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize