your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
