At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Boobs are out for the taking
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
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