Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
