He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
