if i can run in heels then i can drive
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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