Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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