yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
