You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
