windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
