People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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