I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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