Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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