Pregnant stripper...not hot.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
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